Tuesday, August 19, 2014

2 Weeks to Go

Today marks two weeks before the C-Section.

In my head I know he still has plenty of time to arrive before then, but having that deadline makes me anxious. I know it won't be the end of the world if August has to be a C-Section baby, but I would be disappointed. I keep feeling like he's just going to stay in there. I know - every pregnant woman says that. I'm just ready. There's nothing else to prepare. I'm ready to be a mom again, without the marring of grief. I'm ready to take him home and have him meet all of his family. All that's left is the waiting.

...Because Gilmore Girls quotes apply to everything.
At the last doctor visit they checked my fluid levels via ultrasound. It was very brief, so they didn't get a great picture, but here's his last photo op until he makes his debut!
37 weeks and 5 days down...

Monday, August 11, 2014

Back Again

Last night we went on the hospital tour. We'd scheduled one last time we were pregnant, but Penny was born before we could do it.

We got to hear about the check-in procedures, see a birthing room, and the nursery. Some was familiar, some was new. We really just wanted to see the "normal" side of the hospital. We are all too familiar with the NICU and the WICU. 

I've been thinking quite a bit about the last time we stayed at Winnie Palmer. In particular, something my dad said. We were giving our family each a chance to hold Penny and say goodbye before they removed the breathing machines and other cords maintaining her life. When my dad held her, he looked at me with a sad smile and said "Next time you're here, it'll be different."

So here I am, not-so-patiently awaiting August to make his appearance, anxious to see all the differences. This time has already been very different from the last pregnancy. All that's left is the wait. Waiting for labor to start. Waiting to see if we can progress naturally to the end or if we'll end up having to do a c-section anyway. 

One thing we know will be different will be the ride home. This time, there will be three of us in the car.