Saturday, August 3, 2013

I Just Read: MWF Seeking BFF

Married White Female Seeking Best Friend Forever.


Wow. Is that relatable, or what?

When a friend of mine shared this book on Facebook, I knew she didn't have me in mind. She had simply enjoyed it and wanted to recommend it. I saw that title and realized that this book might meet me where I am.

I'm twenty-five, employed, and have no kids at home. Most of my friends my age have moved away. That's fine, I know my age bracket (twenties, graduated, childless, seeking employment) is transient. The girls a little younger than me are still in college, and not in the same stage of life as me. That's fine, I don't hold it against them, it's just harder to discuss life with someone still sheltered by academia. The women a little older than me have kids and some are full time employed as well. That's fine too, I expect to be there soon, although I'm not there yet. It's all fine. But I can't make friends at playgroups, I can't make friends at college parties, and I can't make friends with people who are leaving to make a life out-of-state. So what do I do?

This writer gets it. She moved from New York to Chicago to make a life with her husband-to-be, finding herself in a situation much like mine. She has her lifelong friends, living out-of-state. She has her work and yoga acquaintances who are good for a chat or an outing here and there. But what about in the middle? Where are our girlfriends to call up last minute to go out, or have a standing lunch date with, or just call to talk to and they get you?

Getting connected is the hard part. MWF Seeking BFF is about author Rachel Bertsche's yearlong quest to find those friends. Each week she goes on a friend-date with a new girl. Worst case scenario, she'll have met fifty-two new acquaintances and discover she doesn't have time to invest in a new BFF. Best case scenario, she'll find a few ladies she can really connect with and become close with.

In the end, this book is about people meeting people, the circles we run in, and how to bridge the gaps. It is surprisingly well-researched, which I appreciate. Bertsche grows over the course of her year-long journey and through writing this book she shares her gathered knowledge with us.  Bertsche writes as if she's writing to a girlfriend, and by the time you finish reading you might feel like one of her fifty-two girl dates.

I would recommend this book to any woman who finds themselves feeling friendless, finds themselves in a new town, or just someone who wants some insight in how to be more outgoing.

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