Friday, January 16, 2015

Weird Things to Tell a Mommy

When I was pregnant, I was pleasantly surprised how few weird comments were directed at me. I almost never had to answer too personal questions and no one tried to touch my round belly. 

Then I had the baby. 

Babies seem to break down social barriers. Random people come up to me just to look at him. I don't usually mind - I love looking at his sweet smile, too. But sometimes people say the weirdest things around newborns. Here are a few recent gems:


1. While shopping, I've been asked several times by several people, "What aisle did you get him on?" Ok, I know they were trying to be cute, but it's a pretty weird thing to say if you think about it. It implies that I bought (or conceived!) him in the grocery store. Or even that they want to buy my baby. So inappropriate. My baby is an independent person, not property. Even in an adoption situation, in which money is exchanged to bring the child home, parents are paying for the services and paperwork required, not for the child him- or herself. I feel like people need to think about the implications of their words before they speak them - especially to a stranger.


2. "I just want to eat him up!" Cannibalism. Enough said.


3. "She is so cute!" Gender doesn't have to be an awkward guessing game, y'all. Feel free to ask me "What's your baby's name?" or "Is your baby a boy or a girl?" I love answering questions about my child! But don't assume that he's a girl because he has a lot of hair. Or if you can't tell from his name, please ask me to clarify. Gender is a know-before-you-go subject in my book. By the way, August is a boy's name and Augusta is a girl's name.


4. This is more of a "weird thing to do." Strangers touching my baby. One of the perks of baby wearing is that fewer people try to grab my son's hand or foot when he's attached to me. Look, I know my kid is cute, but it's never okay to touch without asking. I don't know you and you don't know me. I don't know if you're healthy or have the flu. You don't know if my son is immunosuppressed from a long stay in the NICU. So (little old ladies in Publix), unless you're a good friend of mine, never touch my adorable baby without asking first. 

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These are just some of my pet peeve things about my son. I'm sure other moms have their own red-button topics: what or how they feed their children, a mom's choice to work or stay home, criticism of their kids' clothing... I've been blessed not to deal with anything too offensive! I'm sure I've accidentally offended other moms from time to time. But I hope each of you are sensitive when talking to mommies you may not know! 

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